sorry its been a while

So I noticed I’ve started to post to this less and less.

I’m gunna! Im not going to stop cuz this is my diary….

Anyway, its been like a week and a half. I barely remember whats happened, but now PGF K and I have an inside joke, which is great. Jazz band is over, so there goes PGF MC. The super team has gone swimming multiple times now. We planned a p90x day, but we couldn’t get a video so we played xbox kinect. Lollll

There was this drama with friend SS because she wanted to come running with the super team but I guess the other girls wated it as an exclusive thing….? So there was thing of her feeling hurt and me feeling bad and her not talking to me. But its all good now!

Friday night I actually hung out with friend DS! And MT and KS. It was pretty fun, and I went straight to church afterwards.

On Saturday we got up early and went clam digging! Yes, clam digging. We drove out about 40 minutes away to this nice beach and got these pinto clams that were like bigger than 4 inches long! Crazy, huh? We got in the water and stabbed the sand with a huge shovel, then dug in if we felt a clam. I didn’t get any. Friend JC got one, and bro k got one (and then some small ones we weren’t allowed to keep because they had to be at least 4 inches),and then some nice dude gave us one (he took pity on us…they had like 10). Then we hung out until we drove home around 12 and dropped off JC. We had plans, but she cancelled….made me feel like crap. Whatever.

With nothing to do that day, I made clam chowder. Then me and my mom went on a directed shopping spree, and I bought everything I’ve needed for a while, which includes: a new bikini (there was this great deal at pacsun….buy any top get any bottom free. Seriously….i got a great top on clearance for 15 bucks from oneil and a free bottom that was 40 dollars from billabong. Yesssssss), and I exchanged the black flats, and then I went to look for yoga pants but I couldn’t find any, and then I got some underwear (a thong….my first one. Ewwww only for clingy skirts and stuff), then I got boardshorts and this guy tank top that I love. There was this training one-piece that was super pretty but it was $50. Where do I find a cheap training one-piece?

Went to church on Sunday, like always. After, this guy had a senior recital????

Went home, did homework.

On Monday (it was memorial day) the super team met at LN’s house and went running and we ran this great pretty 4 mile loop. I was really happy because I really wasn’t tired at all! We ran super slow though, at like a 9:30 pace, because the others were having a hard time.

We went swimming after, then we watched high school musical 3! So corny…we sang along.

We ordered pizza and washed her sister’s car, then I left to go to this family dinner with my cousins (who are like 50 years old). The food was really great, and to my surprise I actually like them. Past the funny Singapore accent, they are really nice. We watched the social network and went home. I fell asleep in the car. I always sleep in the car. Any trip longer than 20 minutes, im gone.

Oh almost forgot! I ‘lost’ my ipod last week, but I found it on Sunday. I am ashamed to say where I found it, but it was in my backpack in the exact place it was supposed to be. I don’t know how I missed it.

School was today and yesterday, I had an ok day, the biggest thing was that in English we did partners and mine totally ignored me the entire time. Made me feel like a loser.

The super team went to swimming today! I got to flaunt my new swimsuitttt.

Well that’s it!

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band, 5k beach, chill

so thats how my weekend has basically gone.

friday afternoon the band was shipped off to our city’s baseball game, and we got to play the star spangled banner! that was pretty fun. i got to see some of the band people i’d like to get to know better.

i was hanging out with some juniors and they were like, behind my back, ‘____ pulls.’ and i have no idea what that means because when i turned around and asked, they wouldn’t tell me. anyone know? aw well, just another term i have no clue about.

we hung out after, just watching the game, kind of. we took a really fun long walk to find a burger, and when we finally found it, they didn’t do take out! so we found some fast place…

then i hung out and ate so much junk food, like chocolate-covered pretzels (like half a bag full!) and kettle corn and yah….

we left before the game ended and sang pop songs the whole way home. so fun its crazy…reminiscing….

the next day, i got up early and drove over to SS’s house, where we left to run the city 5k! it was sups fun, especially since i finally got to see JC! JJJJJCCCCC i haven’t seen her in forever and i practically attacked her when i saw her all surprised.

except when i went to run, i promised JC i would stick with her no matter what. and vice versa. because i thought she would be faster.

not true. half way through with a maybe 7:30 minute mile pace, she got tired! and we had to walk! the other girl we were running with ditched us, so i stayed. i got her to slowly jog, then pushed it a bit, but she couldn’t take it. we kept that up until the end, where she pushed through and sprinted with me to the finish line. we got 25:25. that is a better time than i thought, but i think if i kept up at my own top pace i could have gotten sub-20, because i was not tired at all! thats really exciting, because thats the first sign of improvement all these workouts have shown! i know for sure a year ago, when i first started running, there is no way i would have been able to do that.

after there was a mini street fair thing with all these booths with free stuff! pretty great

after, we walked around, and JC left. she came back later, and we met her at this surf store. then we walked back and picked up this guy M. then we walked back to her house and changed to swimsuits, then walked to the beach and chilled. we ran into the water, and it was pretty warm. we met AD there with her brother (who somehow, in the past year, got really hot and studly haha) and swam past the waves.

then MB and JC had to leave, and AD stayed behind. me, SS, and PGF M walked really far on the beach to SS’s friend’s house. they have these reallllly steep crickety old stairs, and we walked to the nearest mexican local place an bought some food and then hung out in her infinity pool. ahhhh, the life of rich people. i wish i lived there.

then we walked back to ss’s and hung out on her trampoline until PGF M left.

he was really nice, and the thing was, he wasn’t awkward and i wasn’t awkward around him. this coming from me, who is usually pretty awkward around guys. i think  its because i didn’t see him as, well, that way, and he wasn’t that hot. therefore i wasn’t nervous, therefore i was fun to be around, and therefore he like me too. i gotta work on doing that with other guys to, because i know there are great guys out there that i would want to be friends with.

i have a hot guy problem, I’ve discovered. more on that later.

anywhoooo, we ate dinner which was great and then watched groundhog day, then we were so pooped from the long day we fell asleep right away.

the next morning, we had pancakes and brussel sprouts and then we left to the farmer’s market. it was really cool and i got to eat so much great food!

my dad picked me up and i went home. i had nothing to do today, so i was inspired to bake peanut -butter banana oatmeal bars! they turned out great, and they are super healthy so i pigging out as we speak.

great day over all, no makeup for 3 days so far, and braless. feels like summer.

mothers day and good week (5/14 – 5/17)

it was a great mothers day! i got up early and made this pear cake thing that tasted great, then i made my  mom an acai bowl (and i geniusly added peanut butter to the smoothie to simulate the peanut-y granola) and banana-cinnamon-spiced oatmeal for my grandparents! then we went to church and i helped make banana bread and then we watched the presentations that we recorded. i did a dance that was sort of embarrassing because no one else did anything out of the ordinary at all….

so yup. great mothers day in all.

then on monday, instead of going running with the super team, they all cancelled on me! so me and MB went with SS to the beach where we did 6 sets of stairs, then went for an impromptu dip in our sports bras and underwear. the water was super warm and great! we got out past the waves and treaded water and floated….summereeeeee huh?

then on tuesday i brought rice in a bag to school for lunch…i took crackers from the debate room and crushed them in…soooo good. i must do that again sometime. Xcrush V (yes, the X is there now) was like ‘is that granola?’ remember that food joke-thing we had at the beginning of the year when i was crazy for him? hahaha it feels crazy now.

we went on a walk while we went to the ‘bathroom’…i brought my iPod and we sang along to eminem.

on wednesday we did the super team thing but LN was still ‘sick’….we ended up having a pretty productive day, since i pushed them the entire time, and then we hopped into the pool in our sports bras and did a few laps. my underwear was white. it was see through. i found that out the hard way.

KS found us and we persuaded her to join us. super fun. i miss her.

and today in debate i talked to Xcrush V for the first time in a long time. he’s nice, as a guy you say hi to when you pass.

we went for a walk again and saw friend PS. she’s in photography, so we did a mini photoshoot, and she got a retarded picture of me where i swear i look constipated, but they all said it was ‘pretty’. now its in her final project front and center AND on Facebook with like 10 comments and a few likes for all to see. joy.

today i also discovered I’m a total loser in english class. i knew i had no friends, but i assumed i faded into the background. not the case. my friend informed me that some girls in that class thought i was ‘weird’ and ‘stuck up’. yay.

had jazz band today. that PGF MC? i think he has a crush on me. its cute….he always rushes over to help me set up, and when i ask my friends for things like borrowing their phones he literally ran across the room and offered me his. i like him. he’s nice as a friend.

also, MB is now a friend! that i hang out with and stuff!

EMC is now my friend as well. i don’t think i could ever let my guard completely down with her though….theres always this competitiveness in the air…like if i do worse than her she knows it and gets all superior..

SS has cemented herself as a friend who i can trust.

I’m spending more time with old friends like AD and KS.

in summary, my social life has ramped up. like 10 notches. here i come!

beachy days (5/8 – 5/13)

it feels like summer.

i had the most amazing week i have had in forever. i think it was because i slept a lot. being rested makes you feel amazing. like, its a circle. you feel more energetic, so you are happier, and you attract more people towards you, you get more done, and then since you have extra time you get to sleep more! love it.

nothing insane happened, but I’ve been hanging around with my old friends a ton. every lunch has been so much funner. i laughed, and everyone laughed, and i got tons of compliments and…..i just don’t know, everything went great, and i felt like i actually had friends, you know? sometimes you don’t feel like that.

we went to the gym on thursday, and during piano teacher was really pretty happy with me. then on friday we had a spontaneous beach hang out after school, and that was pretty fun. and on wednesday my friends KS and AG called me and invited me to go running with them…and that was pretty great and flattering, i mean, who doesn’t like to be invited places?

PLUS, the whole situation with JS and KM and EMC is a lot better. EMC and i are a lot better. we never actually ‘talked’, it just……got better. weird, right? they just stopped leaving me out. i think EMC got the message. but i also think its because, since I’ve been hanging around my old friends and being happier, she is more attracted towards me. i read somewhere that people unconsciously gravitate towards happy, energetic people.huh.

went to church on friday, and spontaneously invited my friend KW. we had fun, bonding, and singing hilariously poppy boy bands like one direction and boyfriend by the beibs. sometimes i feel like we drift, and it was great to spend time together.

at church we just spent time preparing for mother’s day. it was nice because my pastor put me in charge of a few things, since EMC wasn’t there. he usually puts her in charge of things. funny, because we made banana bread and the recipe was really weird, like it called for a 1/4 cup of salt. yes, salt. we didn’t think that was right, so we added 1/8 instead, but of course it was a typo and it was completely disgusting. that would be a good prank, yeah?

then today i woke up early and went running for this school fundraiser. we ran the mile. i got 6:59! i know thats not great, but that was the best i’ve ever gotten, AND i didn’t even try that hard! i’m pretty sure if i tried, really tried, i could cut it down 30 seconds at least. i was barely winded at the end!

then we were dropped off at the pool, where we hung out for a bit. then EMC got picked up, and me and MB chilled until we walked home and hung out a bit there, and made crazy lunches. then we went to the beach, and had a crazy time with my mom’s insane driving. she made a u-turn. in the middle of an intersection. yes. no i am not joking.

we hung out at the beach. we were going to meet SS there, but her dad bonding with her, so we just hung out in the water, which was freezing. we lay in the sun, then headed up to the boardwalk. we walked along, but then i stubbed my toe and it started bleeding grossly. then we bought a band aid and stole hand sanitizer and fixed it up, but not before my flip flops were nasty with a pool of blood and i sort of left a trail on the floor…..

we walked pretty far, then starved because we had no money. then since my dad is completely unreliable, we called her dad and he picked us up.

i was dead tired. i just fell asleep on the couch……gotta say, i’m exhausted.

yup. fun fun

annnddd today friend drama

today was decent.

i was all ready to confront EMC on how she had been treating me, when i walk into the classroom and she’s absent. ABSENT! she is never absent! wth?

then i realize i’m happy she’s not there. because i won’t have to feel left out, or not good enough….

then i realized we weren’t friends. because friends want to see each other.

she was in debate though. she was sick. she didn’t say hi to me, she didn’t smile at me, she didn’t talk to me. they didn’t walk with me to the media center, they didn’t save a seat for me, and then they ignored me the entire time.

i don’t know how this happened.

I think i may be a little jealous of KM, since they had been getting close. but i honestly wouldn’t have minded if they hadn’t shut me out like this. like the other day, walking to the lab, we left without EMC. of course, KM stops right in her tracks and goes, “lets wait for EMC!”. this got on my nerves because, hey, every SINGLE FREAKING DAY they leave without ME. i don’t see anyone stopping and waiting for me! this is what EMC used to do for me, and what i would do for her. what happened to that?

so today after we did our little run that we just started (since track is over, we decided to keep running to prepare for cross country), we were alone at the curb. it was fun and nice, because when its just me, she’s the same as before. i get up the guts, and i say “we need to talk.”

she took it as a joke, like “yeah! not like we are doing it now or anything…”

but i was like, “no. we need to talk. about us.’

and she kind of knew and agreed.

we are going to talk this out. i hope we become friends again. a lot because she is in a ton of activities with me, and it would be hell if we didn’t get along.

so wish me luck, whoevers reading this.

just an incidence

this happened about a week ago and i kind of want to remember it.

well in debate we were just chatting with crush V. actually, he’s not really ‘crush’ V anymore, but thats how he’s tagged everywhere so i’m just going to keep calling him that.

anyway, we were chatting. then AF goes ‘oh look at those freshman girls, all over him!” this made me kind of mad, so i muttered ‘Well, AF should talk.” apparently they didn’t hear the annoyed undertone in my voice, but everyone cracked up.

later on, while i passed by him and said hi, he was like ‘i liked your joke in debate” all mischievous, sort of laughing.

its nice being friendly

 

social life

well i think my social life has jumpstarted itself!

last last weekend (the 21 of april) i saw friend MH, who i have not seen in forever! we went shopping, but didn’t buy anything. it was really fun though.

the next week, (the 28 of april), i went to moonlight with MH again and met up with friend KS and SaS. it was actually kind of funny because we both planned to go to the beach, but when we got there, we realized we were invited to two totally different hang outs. i figured this out when we met KS and SaS and asked ‘where’s everyone else?’ and they were like “this IS everyone else…..?” then i had an epiphany.

but it worked out cause we joined both groups later. we went in the water, and it was freeeeezing. it was super fun, and we didn’t notice but the waves got HUGE, and suddenly the funniest thing happens: friend AD whips her hair around to me so intensely its like in slow-mo, and yells, “geeeeeetttt ouuuuuuuttttt! geeeeettttt ooouuuuutttt nooooooowww!” and i was having fun, so i was confused, but then KS grabs me and starts panickingly running back to shore, and AD gets crushed under a wave and goes “DOOOONNTTT LEAAVVE MEEEEE!”

turns out we were caught in a riptide, and later on we had a hilarious fun time retelling the story, except more awesome and exaggerated, to everyone else, in which AD was a hero and a sacrificial lamb trying to save us. haha. it really was like a movie in that scene where the mother tries to save her child from a bomb and sacrificing herself, like in harry potter….

we hung out on the beach, then went to SS’s house. we ate mexican food, then went home. except on the way home, we spontaneously decided to have a sleepover at KS’s house. it was sups fun, and we jumped into the pool at like 11 at night and took pictures on KS’s underwater camera.

we slept pretty early, like around 1. we talked and caught up and it was great. called guys. ya know.

went home, was going to go to a birthday party, but it got cancelled. went to church. saw EMC. we aren’t friends anymore. she treats me like an idiot, and is cruel and purposefully mean to me and puts me down. she ditches me for KM and JS. they don’t even hide it. of course, when we are alone she is great with me, but that of course is obviously not what I’m looking for in a friend.

the week went fine. it was the last week of track. i did absolutely horrible on the last meet. ugh, i got like 18.7 on hurdles and like 15 for sprints and for long jump i got like 13’9″ instead of 14’9″. sad for a last meet.

me and EMC carpooled back to school and did the band concert. went home…

thursday was the day i returned uniforms 😦

friday i went home with friend SS and friend MB. we picked up her friend NB who is crazy sweet and got acai bowls. then we went to her house and helped set up decorations and jumped on her trampoline. then we slept over and ate stew and made flour less peanut butter cookies but burnt them. it was great. the next morning we ate the most amazing sourdough pancakes in the world, and i ate literally the whole bowl of batter.

went home around 10 and performed with the band at this art festival at school. it was super hot.

then i went home, hung out, then went to SS’s actual birthday party. we sucked helium, which was fun, then ate like 5 tacos then SAW friend EC! then went to the beach and ran into the water (which was crazy warm, like lukewarm water! freaky. i felt like i was wasting it, i wanted to go in so bad but i didn’t have a suit.) we walked to the main beach and saw a group of really hot guys.me and MB scoped this one really tan one and waved! later, the entire group swarmed him (so desperate haha) and got his number. his friends at the bonfire saw a huge group of girls and came over, and we had a fun time. then it was some college girl’s birthday, and we serenaded her….then we ran back to SS’s house and had a sick dance party. she had like strobe lights and stuff so it was super fun.

we played never have i ever and i found out who had done crazy stuff and it made me so sad. like who got cross hazed…like 5 people. its like they think its cool.

we went back up and had another dance party and ate brownies and ice cream until it was time to go.

fun in all. i think i needed that; just a party to let loose and forget friend drama and failing at everything and stuff.