I’ll spare ya’ll the two hours worth of stream of consciousness of very high thoughts. The general pattern was a focus on the feeling of being high devolving into innane philosophical pondering on my life situation and reflections on self.
I present to you: weed
4/21/16, 11:35pm, notes from iPhone
I feel obligated to record how I am when I am high oops just wrote oops instead of oh shit I just forgot what word
Smiles lifting smiles are crucial to understanding of the hypothetical meta universe. The hmu is shit I forgot again. Weed makes you forget things, like I can’t even spell check myself without forgetting what word I trying to say and it happened again oh memory
Memory is involved on tbe microlevel hypothetical exponential memory capabilties are necessary for functioning
The swaying I can’t enjoy
I could enjoy but I don’t
Because there is more to do
I am always running towards the hypothetical universe it lies above our heads in a red square box. All sound is square, it cuts through the fog/haze that is the world.
This is definitely how the Bible was written – highness and intense journaling
Perhaps it was all a cold winter breeze
I wrote that on purpose if I focus I can write things on purpose
When someone says me name,
Pocky is in the background
I can act here and then I am gone
Sound is square it cuts like sandpaper
We must chronicle our experiences and we must make them known
On the macro level it is important and on the microlevel it is haughty
Feminism
I wrote a title because I felt obligated too
But why does spelling count if the meaning comes across?
You can’t see anyone else’s hypothetical meta world
They can only see it when one looks up at one’s own meta wirld
Like the photo website it starts with an s
Femjnism
I almost forgot
I always usually forgot because feminism has a bad rap
Extremism is hated but it is necessary
Now that I am aware of this, can I act on it? What level of firm belief makes philosophical argument affect how the philosopher actually lives his life?
Permanent change is fleeting
Fleeting change may be a logical fallacy
Kant sounds like cunt
Typed josh but different josh
Why did I not think of bf josh until now?
Oh wait I did I was worried he would see me
I am typing methodically
I am talking as if we are in a dream
Descartes
Popular culture has value, head hunting has value, horrible things still have value in the universe purely for diversity
People do not matter
Time is fleeting and the past is gone
The past does not matter
The purpose in life is to make each individual moment good
The paat doesn’t matter
Because by maintaing the good present we simultaneously create the good past
And insure for the good future
But hedonism is not right
You must watch out for everyone else’s good as well
To what extent? How kind can you be without breaking? Fingers are hard
I am recording – I am a recorder – that is what I am here for
Participate in the present, but also record the present
People must know each other’s present to be kind
Or predict each other’s present
Other hypothetical worlds cut through the haze (you can see then now)
I somehow don’t believe I am high
But on the meta highness level, i know this is not true
How meta can we go before we hit the cedar sky
Blessing on blessings on blessings
Pockies were not twigs
Memory is selective
I am now aware that they are playing contact
I want to know what my high self thinks of my mother
I must choose
Good people horrible together
Suffering is so necessary for kindness
That is why there is suffering
I need to read poetry
Earlier I couldn’t stop myself from talking
That is how the present works
You have no control over the present in a micro hypothetical level
I must chronicle
Food will be interesting
Food is mundane and brings me back to this world
Flow is in the meta world
We must find what brings us to the meta world
Music is in the present
When we live in the present that is the meta world
Self- censorship is unconscious
You can be in a haze and the only thing you can focus on is the present
That is the only thing that brings you back
This is why there is mundane ness
It is to keep us here
Eating and pooping and all of that
I could wander off and not know
I can do so many things and not know
We are all doing things that we don’t know
There is no blame
Blame it on the meta world
Other issues I want my high self to think about
Look at me go, recordings
I laughed to my because I thought I should
The pockies are a constant
They bring me back
Memory patches – how long can we delay the residual memory
As always, I thought the micro scale but it’s actually years and years long memory flashes
This is all hapoening and I am experiencing it later
I am back
The nature is present
It grounds us
So much is happening in my head but I can act normal
I can edit my mind and say what was not in there
Then where did it come from?
From the outside
But then where did that come from? The hypotjetical boxes? Then are the hypothetical boxes part pf each person?
They cannot be
They are placed there
By the others it does not matter who
It just matters that it is not yours
We must make our hypothetical boxes ours
They will turn ivory and fade into the haze
We will join the haze
Do not disturb the haze
My eyes are closed but I am seeing my mind
That is why eyes roll back when eyes close
To see thy self
I can say what is the present and be sane
If I say the haze I am in not in the future
Thise who do not speak are in the haze
Not necessarily a good or bad thing
Just different
Laughing takss you inthe hypothetixal world
Silence brings you down
Don’t be too hypothetical that it bribgs you bring that you miss the oresent
Everhthing that was after went into the haze
Talking bring me inti the oresent
I forget the haze
I leave the haze
The haze is necessary for hypothetical thought
We need silence and time for the haze
Sleep in the haze
Don’t allow your sleep to lose the haze
I am swaying in the haze
No
I am swirling in the pearly blue
I am looking up like I did on molly
Into the expansiveness and inhaling the feelings
I forget to appear happy
Even if I am happy
Sometime I am not
This is necessary
Did I mention spelling is irrelevant?
That will probably be among the stupider quotes of this
I am conscious of this on the meta level
I just seemed mean just now
I can detect faces when I am high
My eyes do not feel slumping when I am high but are they
The haze clouds the sight but the haze must create the sight
Facial expressions are innate because I did it when I was high
Thank god I am not faking that at least
Every laugh should be like the ones when I was high
Unable to stop it
The smiles not retired
Working overtime
I thought about working overtime earlier – it was block letters ‘wp’
Is the hypothetical world conscious
I am in the hypothetical world when I write
It is triggered by silence of the individual
When I can think meta thoughts and know they are stupid I am here
Eating is interesting – I lose track of what I eating but I still feel full
I wonder horny high Vicki would be like
Maybe I will call Josh
It has been 16 minutes since I last asked I can vaguely believe
Maybe felt longer or completely out of time
Is the haze in time
I don’t believe in the haze anymore
I only believe in it when I am in it
Time is longer than our clocks tell us
I lie to connect with people
But I should not
I should allow myself not connect with people and rather connect to the right ones
I think I am doing more than I am
Earlier I thought I was doing less than I was
I thought it was all a dream
Once in the past, it was nonexistent
It was no loner real
It joined the haze
Only just now realized why recording – it’s because I don’t expect: plan to do this again
Nothing happens again
There the deep behind the sky
That deep is what should talk to us and us to it
That which you oretend you believe becomes part of the real memory
Belief comes after the though
I never had pride in my asianness
But now I do because it is a necessity
It is always because it is a necessity
Oppression breeds neccesity
I write because my hands tells me to interesting sensation of pulling up hands as well as smile
I am unconsciously mean
I must leave the haze to be kind
This why I am stuck as a start square box
Like the sounds cutting through the gaze
Music is the present
I am the dizziest when eyes are half closed
Not fully closed but just half
That is how the haze functions
I donmt believe in the haze but I still must talk about it
I must fake it to see later
Josh timer – it’s only been 15 minutes
Time is go e inthe haze
It stretches and we float out
We live in the present to get it over with
This time was only 8 minutes holy shit
I am keaving time and never coming back
But this leaving time is unbearable
It makes time too long
8:13 I think I sobering up
In any case I feel pess creative
I wonder how these will change if I sober up
Can I write continuously until sober to record this? Probably not I am running out of battery
Now I am completely present when I am looking up and in the present aka the weed is wearing off
When I start to write it prolongs the haze
We enter the haze and prolong tbe haze
Once it happens we cannot be sure it happenned
Now it is only here when I close my eyes and focus
I am undulating
Bambam Sister Nancy
A video of one person on diff substances – both the video of the person and how they do the video will show the effects
