12/23/16, 9:23pm, unknown context

I find myself, in trying to have empathy for other larger things, being cynical of other “smaller” struggles. For example, the Boston Marathon bombing — that’s a legitimate tragedy. And while it’s nowhere near the mass scale of what’s happening in Syria, or Sudan, that doesn’t make the pain from this American loss any less real than the pain elsewhere. I need to work on not discounting this pain. I need to have empathy for all tragedies, rather than discount those that are less severe or more white.

To be idealistic is to be trusting

To be idealistic is to relinquish responsibility of safety outwards

Pragmatists are willing to be the bad guy, to take on that responsibility of fault for safety’s sake

Idealists push that responsibility away

I think I want to be an idealist

I can be completely trusting, let things fall to shit because of others

Is it enough to know that you are doing your best?

It’s outcome vs the driving forcesand as a nihilist, the outcome is unimportant, as all outcomes are neither good nor bad

and so

I choose to be idealist

leaving periods of my sentences leave thoughts half-formed, left in snatches
I suppose it’s ok as long as I learn to finish those thoughts as well

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