when distilled, is that I feel utterly replaceable in every aspect of my life in every friendship in every relationship in every job I feel that I am a sponge, or a vessel, or an empty thing that other people don’t mind being around “do I have a personality?”
When people ditch CM’s party, they are annoying. Why would they do that? She asks. She is angry at them. If people had ditched my party, I would be sad. My party was lame, I would think. I would feel unliked. I don’t throw parties.
I am so self-absorbed. All my posts are about me. And it’s not that I only think about myself, obviously, but the things I decide to post about – what I deem important enough to remember to write about – it’s all about me. I wish it weren’t so, but at the same time, there’sContinue reading “On Being Self-Absorbed”
MB…. She was so odd. In some ways, she reminds me of…me. Insecure, with an overbearing [and embarrassing], extroverted asian mother with little knowledge of American social customs. The first day, her mom wanted to take a picture of her, and she went “Omigod hide me,” and pulled us in to literally hide her. WeContinue reading “2014 Music Camp – MB”
food for thought….. makeup. makes you pretty. alls well and fine. right? then why do i feel happiest without makeup? why, before i wore makeup, i was completely content with my appearance? i look back on pictures of me before and i honestly think i look fine. why does my friend, who is naturally gorgeous,Continue reading “makeup”