And more semi-closure

I called AYl today.

A text from AYl yesterday triggered a 12 – 3am relationship story swap between JJ, DW, and I. And I guess I knew what I had to do.

The call started out rough. My stupid mic was broken, and the serious phone call was awkwardly inhibited by a 5 minute technical difficulties. The video chat was downgraded to a voice call. Clearly the universe was screwing with me.

I came right out and said it: “I’m having feelings for someone here.”

Yes, yes, I know; that’s not the full story. It’s whatever. I can’t hurt him that much.

Partly because I’d pretty much implied that in the tone and frequency of my texts, partly because he’s been expecting this since before I even left for college, and partly because he’s older and understanding and mature, he took it completely in stride. “That’s cool,” he said. “That’s exciting for you.”

And then we moved past that so fast that it was like that wasn’t even the reason I’d called. “What else is new over there?”

I was kind of surprised. “You…you want me to just ramble about my mundane life?”

“Yes,” he said.

So I did.

Thanks, AYl. Really. I can’t thank you enough.

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AYl

We never fall in love. We fall into almost love and then life takes us away from each other. And without that memory of skin against skin to connect us across distance and time, we become, once again, strangers.

Pearl, Ali Rachel. “On Tinder, Off Sex.” The New York Times. The New York Times, 17 Oct. 2015. Web. 20 Oct. 2015.