3 days later, 12:40am

Today was the first day I felt normal again. It’s fall, which takes me straight back to this time last year. The brisk air, the peacoat pulled out far too early and too eagerly. I bounced to class across campus with WH by my side. It’s the same and it’s completely different. I talked toContinue reading “3 days later, 12:40am”

When JKm Knows Me

WH shook things up this morning (again – details later), and I decided to go to JKm for advice. I’d never before, mostly because he’s so non-confrontational I was skeptical he would give advice, and also because I didn’t think he’d want to know about my problems with WH. And he surprised me by reallyContinue reading “When JKm Knows Me”

I Literally Just Wrote Out A Plan for WH

Go to gym, see if I still want to be friends with him. If yes, Dinner: You hurt me by being on and off friends with me randomly and without warning all last semester, and especially the beginning of this semester. I stopped feeling welcome/good/happy around you because you always shot me down and avoidedContinue reading “I Literally Just Wrote Out A Plan for WH”

The Lowdown on WH

WH acknowledged, at the last minute before going separate ways for the night, and in one apologetic sentence, that he’s been pulling away. I acknowledged that I had noticed. And then I went inside, shutting off discussion. My thoughts on this: We got very close, very quickly at the beginning of last semester. Feelings gotContinue reading “The Lowdown on WH”

Good Feelings

You know what’s the best feeling in the world? It’s not being admired by other people. It’s not being popular with the masses. The best feeling is being trusted by someone you care about. There’s something so fulfilling about being that person that another human feels safe being vulnerable with. And it’s worth everything, thatContinue reading “Good Feelings”

Saying Goodbye to JKm

Finals are over, the dorm is packed, and I leave via public transportation (fingers crossed I end up in the right state) in two hours. The last few days have been amazing. I’m reminded how I need to take time to truly relax – it’s just been quality time. Listening to a symphony with WH.Continue reading “Saying Goodbye to JKm”

Feeling alone

I guess the sucky part of having an official boyfriend is the expectations. I was sick last night, and miserable, on the biggest party weekend of the year. He’d volunteered to stay in with me. I’d half-heartedly fought against it, and happily accepted. But on his part, his shows were superficial. He invited to hisContinue reading “Feeling alone”

I’m an idiot

WH just told me he likes me. Literally straightened my love life out less than a week ago. But more importantly, WH. I can’t believe what I put him through. I told him all my boy problems; I literally texted him a live stream of me trying to a let a guy down easily. I askedContinue reading “I’m an idiot”